RANDOM JOTTINGS

I love staying at hotels. I really do. I love opening the door and entering a pristine room with beautifully crisp white sheets and plump pillows, everything spotlessly clean, kettle at the ready with tea bags and coffee sachets and, if you are in a posher hotel, a packet of biscuits. I take an inordinate and child like pleasure in all this.

But the main reason I love hotels is the TOILETRIES. Yes, I admit it, I am a total sucker for those teeny weeny little blocks of soap, the little bottles of shampoo and conditioner and the skin lotion (usually very runny and not very good), the disposable toothbrush, the sewing kit, and anything else that the hotel chain deems necessary.

When I recently flew to Oz I stayed at a Sheraton Hotel the night before my flight and when I left the next morning hoovered up the spare miniatures from the bathroom. When I got on my Business Class flight I was slightly disappointed to find that Singapore Airlines do not give you a nice toiletry set – ok you get flight socks, ear plugs and slippers (now residing in my bedroom drawers as I speak) but that is all. Bit of a swizz I thought…..

But I hit pay dirt when Kathryn and I went to stay at Tokuriki in Fiji.  First up, we had a sink – each. Yes each. The shower was at the side of our bungalow with a bamboo side but glass roof so you could feel you were outside when showering. And there lined up on the shelves were the following:

• Shaving kit – ok left that behind for obvious reasons
• Sewing kit – another to add to the collection (On reaching home discovered I already had five lurking in my chest of drawers)
• Toothbrush and toothpaste
• Shampoo
• Conditioner
• shower gel
• Body lotion (this was a good one)
• Hand cream
• Mouthwash

And each day they were topped up. I will admit to being very sneaky and putting the unused stuff in my suitcase so the bathroom looked bereft each day and the housekeeping ladies, all lovely and who I am sure knew what I was up to, piled more stuff up for me. 

Once when I was staying a very upmarket hotel in Toronto (it was a work thing could not have afforded it otherwise) I came back one day to find NO NEW TOILETRIES had been left for me. Shock horror. I called housekeeping and said that I had run out and that obviously housekeeping must have not realised this and could they please send me up a few more. "Of course madam, our apologies" was the reply. Ten minutes later there was a knock on my door and I opened it to find a Bell boy  YES a BELL BOY clutching a huge box which he presented to me with a flourish and "Compliments of the Management" and when I opened it there was about ten of everything in a presentation box for me to take home. Way to Go!!

This is my current collection:

Kathryn just laughs at me though I remember once when we were staying in New York, she got exasperated the first night we were there and discovered that I had already annexed everything and had put it all in my suitcase. "Mum for heaven's sake I need a shower! give me back the shower gel"….

But I have to say my acquisitiveness is as nothing compared to Ross and Chandler in this episode of Friends. Kathryn says she always thinks of me whenever the sees this…

I cannot think why.