Have had a busy week this week and
charging around a lot doing things and I find whenever I do this, I
start to sleep badly and wake up in the middle of the night with a panic
attack. I am my own worst enemy when it comes to overdoing stuff and
nobody to blame but myself for getting stressed. So why do I do it?
Well, you tell me and then we will both know….
Anyway,
have come to some decisions about what I will be doing from now on and
how to pace myself and sort out my priorities. I am, of course,
concentrating on being a grandmother and when I was in London last week
sat down with my daughter and diary and sorted out dates for the coming
months when I will be needed after she returns to work. It will be
difficult and after the closeness and intensity of those first few
months, which feeling can never be replicated, it is now back to the
world of lecturing, setting papers, researching and timetabling etc and I
found on my return to work after my children were born, I no longer
viewed it as important any more, my focus had changed.
So
I, and Helen's mother in law, are going to help out as much as we can
on the days when there is no childcare arranged and I know that my
lovely daughter feels secure and safe knowing that we will be there.
This is now my main priority, to make sure that she and her husband and
Florence are well looked after and supported. Other things have to fall
by the wayside I am afraid, not blogging I hasten to add I love that
too much, but something else I was involved in which I am sad to lose,
but realise I am not Superwoman and cannot do everything I would like.
Out of all the things that matter in the world, family is the most
important.
I am having a quiet day
today while I mull things over and last night, with decisions taken, I
slept much better and feel refreshed today. I still have the living
room to paint which I am going to start tomorrow and will take my time
in so doing, there is no deadline so Elaine No Need to Rush. Went out
for a walk this morning and took a plastic bag with me and went
blackberrying in the woods behind my flat. It had been raining and water
was dripping off the trees and bushes and the earth had that lovely
fresh smell which you get after rainfall and I came back with a bagful
of berries. Loads more coming through as well and nobody seems to pick
them at all and I cannot bear to see them go to waste.
Home
made leek and potato soup for lunch, bijou snoozette afterwards,
writing this now and next up on my idle agenda today is a cup of tea and
then on the sofa to listen to the afternoon Prom concert from the
Albert Hall. It is a Rodgers and Hammerstein special conducted by the
same guy who did the musicals prom last year and which was such a
massive hit the BBC have shown it three times since – this is being
recorded and will be broadcast next weekend so I must set my little
black box and make sure it is there for all posterior….
Discovered
that I liked the series Lewis – did not watch them at first as I was
never a Morse fan but watched them by accident when they screened some
during the World Cup just in case you didn't want to watch Uzbekistan v
Kurdistan and I became hooked on them. I think they are brilliantly
done and Kevin Whately and Laurence Fox have a great rapport on screen
and have now watched Series 1 and 2 with others on the way. NCIS
Series Six also out on DVD now and 24 Series Six also due, but am going
to hold off buying these until the nights are darker and I know I have
something to save up for those afternoons when the curtains are drawn
and the lights are on.
OK I am off to the sofa so back soon
Au reservoir everyone
LATER – have just finished listening to the Rodgers and Hammerstein Prom. Simply WONDERFUL. Instant cure for the miseries or if you are feeling down. Glad my neighbours are away as I sang along with everything and managed to hit the top note at the end of Climb Every Mountain. It is being shown on TV next weekend and all I can say is DON'T MISS IT.
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